Facing the small problems of life in a consistent and emotionally balanced way has been challenging this past week. Change can throw me out of balance and the small problems start to look like really big problems. I had a day where I was initially all over the map emotionally but was then able to remember to calm myself down, think more objectively and listen to what I was feeling. It took some time and attention but I regained some equilibrium.

I think this is what this Step is talking about. Maintaining stability during change and making decisions is what I am working toward.

Listening to Knowledge within me during emotional turbulence was difficult. I had a few days to come to some semblance of certainty before I had to make a final decision on a life change. This time allowed me to put the skills to work that I have gained through this spiritual practice. Stillness, listening, rethinking.

Another thing I have learned is to check out a decision both ways. State what I intend to do and wait. State the opposite and wait. Listen. What is my body telling me? How do I feel? What are my impressions? What are my preferences? Are my preferences impacting my ability to see, know and act according to what is best in this situation?

“Practice consistency today regardless of what is occurring within you or without. This consistency represents a Greater Power within you. This consistency will give you certainty and stability in the face of all disturbances, in the face of all external events and in the face of all emotional states within you This consistency will stabilize and balance you and in time will bring everything into right order within you.”

So, as the emotional dust settled and I practiced these skills and trusted the deeper Wisdom within from Knowledge I understood what course to take. It is not the course I thought I was going to take. Listening to Knowledge is an act of faith. It is not about what I think or want; it is about what is indicated from within – beyond my personal mind, beyond my hopes, fears, plans and wishes.

So the decision is made. I do not know the outcome. But I know from previous experience that not listening to my Inner Guidance – Knowledge – has cost me much in the past. I have learned this through direct experience. Today I am willing to listen. I am willing to follow. Even if that means completely changing direction. Even though this direction change is the right change I still do not know what this will mean.

I no longer have a plan. I am more comfortable with this uncertainty. I trust God’s plan to unfold as I take each step, check it out, adjust, then take another step.

I will be consistent today.

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